I am in the process of reading The Religious Sense by Fr. Luigi Giussani. (It's a great book, but I would recommend reading it with a group to discuss it, as it is quite a dense read.)
Recently, Giussani quoted a poem by Rainer Maria Rilke. It is truly one of the most beautiful excerpts I have ever read:
Put out my eyes, and I can see you still;
slam my ears to, and I can hear you yet;
and without any feet can go to you;
and tongueless, I can conjure you at will.
Break off my arms, I shall take hold of you
and grasp you with my heart as with a hand;
arrest my heart, my brain will beat as true;
and if you set this brain of mine afire,
then on my blood I yet will carry you.
I read this poem from two perspectives: first, my attachment to God; second, His attachment to me. Nothing can separate us - nothing! There is something inside me that is so intimately connected to the Infinite that no matter what may happen, I am drawn to my Maker. In a sense, it's like a giant super-magnet: this desire for Him is so strong that in the middle of all the "junk" in my life, if I can quiet my mind and focus on this core of being - my heart - I can find this compass.
Perhaps in order to truly follow where God is calling me, I must first look within myself. Not following myself, but following that tug, that desire, that connection between my heart and the Infinite that cannot be severed. By following my heart - not just what I want to do in the moment, but where that tugging desire is leading me - I can follow my calling.
These are just some thoughts I've had these past few days, and I'd like to hear yours. Do you agree? Disagree? Is this too idealistic, or does it seem accurate?
1 John 4:19 - "We love because he first loved us."
ReplyDeleteIf "like begets like," in the sense that when I smile, someone else will often smile back, or when I decide to be angry, it will only make it very easy for others to get angry, then I can see love working the same way - although this would be much more simple than divine love.
Help me out with the last part of your post. God calls us through our desires, but also calls us out of and beyond suffering, too. What are you seeking to understand in the second-to-last paragraph?
I don't mean that He calls us only through our desires, but that it is one of the ways that we can discern where He is leading us.
ReplyDeleteFor example, a few weeks ago, I was presented with an opportunity to change jobs. The proposal was for a similar job with a pretty significant pay increase, but I turned it down. To my friend, that probably seemed unreasonable; however, there are many things about my current job and work environment that correspond to my heart in a much deeper way than that larger paycheck ever could.
Although part of me wanted to strongly consider the offer, my heart was pulling me to stay, for many reasons. I know this job is where God is calling me (for now, at least). I might not be able to explain it in words, but the tug of my heart tells me it is true.
So I guess I'm not really asking a question, exactly, aside from the final ones in the post. Does that make sense?
Thanks for the example; it makes sense. I have similar thoughts in bigger life decisions, too.
ReplyDelete